36 Weeks

"Unsure of what the balance held,

I touched my belly, overwhelmed

by what I had been chosen to perform.

But, then an angel came one day,

told me to kneel down and pray. . . ."

-Lauryn Hill



Dear baby K,
The lyrics in the song above reflect how I feel some days. . . .there are times when I can't believe that God has chosen me to be a mommy to all of you, times when I wonder how it will all fall into place. . . and then I remember Peter's words and I begin to pray:

 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God,

that He may exalt you in due time, 

casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.

-1 Peter 5:6-7

 

 

So, it's not about me and what I think I can do and what I think I can handle. . .it's about mommy trusting God, humbling myself before Him, and telling Him all about my concerns. Our God cares for us, sweet girl, and He wants us to tell Him all about it. And so I do.

And when I do, I feel so much better because He reassures, He reaffirms, He comforts, He sustains, He provides, He cares. . .

My excitement to see you grows with each day but I'm trying to remain calm and take it one day at a time. The doctor told me that I am 1-2cm dilated; before we count that as "progress" it's actually the "norm" for me since it's my 7th pregnancy. So we just wait patiently on the Lord and I know you'll come at an appointed time.

I love you sweet girl. Time is ticking. . .

35 Weeks

Hey sweetie-peetie!

This past weekend was the celebration of our Savior's death, burial, and resurrection. Oh, how I pray that you will come to know Him for yourself, that you will learn to depend on Him, that you would never be swayed by the things of this world, but that you put your faith wholeheartedly in Him and Him alone. Dear girl, what a blessing it is to know a Savior, to know that He loves you, to know that you are on His mind, to know that He gave His life for you, and that no matter what, you can ask Him for forgiveness and He'll give it to you. . . what a sweet blessing, the ultimate blessing. Jesus loves you, sweetie, and it is Mommy's prayer that you love Him back.

The past few days have me reflecting--35 weeks! Eeek! It seems this pregnancy has been full, from day one, there's always been something going on in our home life: the surprise news that you were coming, the government shut-down (where Daddy works), home improvements, morning sickness, homeschooling, Thanksgiving and Christmas, bunches of doctor's appointments, the passing of family members, your siblings in swimming, soccer, football and baseball, lots of birthdays, an unexpected family trip . . . on and on.

Yours has been an "active" pregnancy, sweet girl and God has shown me His hand through it all. He has shown me that each part is just a part of His plan, His will--even when Mommy doesn't understand. I rest in the Truth of what He's always known from the beginning of time. . .He knew this season of life would be a part of our story and that He'd never let go of my hand. Keeping my hand in His is where true peace and joy are found. So even though the pregnancy has been full, it has been rich from having the Presence of God with us every step of the way.

Some days, I feel like I just found out that you were on your way. Other days, I think that I can't possibly wait any longer to see you. Back and forth in my mind it goes. I love you, precious baby, and because God gave you to us, I am blessed.